christmas break thus far.

i figured i have a free moment that hasn't been over taken by people in and out of the house and the million things that have to get done while mike's home....

the break is has been great. christmas was wonderful we stayed at my parents and got treated like ten year olds :) the next day we were suppose to go to st maries to see mikes mom but the roads weren't gonna let us.... we got into our first accident. it was soooo scary! mike was driving super slow but it still slide us around and smack right into the cement rails. the damage for what happpened is amazing. just the front bumper in torn up but that we can live with. we were both VERY shaken up, unharmed except for my knee hitting the door. its just swollen and bruised but i'll take it.

so today is filled with insurance calls and estimates. yay. the one shitty thing about mike being home for longer than a weekend we actually start to feel like a real husband and wife so we decide to bring up issues like whats going to happen and of course it turns into a huge fight we i seriously want to smack him across the face and of course he thinks he's just going to storm out of here. we could fight on repeat i swear! i love him to death and wouldn't change anything but i think someone is using us for their amusement because we can't fix anything. lol its just dumb... than we try to talk it out sleep on it and everythings fine.... i'm not sure its the healthiest way but for now we both always say its not going to help anything to fight about the future.

sometimes i just really hate being a linewife and the damn unknown.

.Hope.

its been an exhausting weekend.

mom and i headed to tri cities on friday to see the family and be there to support my grandma who was putting on an advent breakfast saturday morning at her church. i didn't know until we got there but she was one of the key speakers. she would be speakin on hope. some of you have met my family and the one thing i always hear is wow your family treats any and everyone like they are your own blood and have known me for years. its true. my grandparents have adopted many more granddaughters and sons than you can imagine. i guess the reason i'm adding this little back ground in my blog is to show where i get my strength from... the woman in my family are the heart and soul. each of them has taught me more and more throughout their experiences and stories. i won't go into their stories because just that their not mine to share. anyways so i've mentioned 2 years ago we lost Luke... to back up a little before that my grandparents after 48 years divorced. it was terrible. we were all so lost. they were apart for 2ish years than decided to remarry and i know its a little crazy but the wedding was amazing. every. single. person. was there. my grandparents have 7 kids. 28 grandkids. 16 great grandkids (this number ALWAYS growing!) so to gather everyone was truely wonderful. little did we know 2 weeks later we would loose Luke. To see my family come together in that time still brings me to my knees. we were there for each other. I believe God brought my grandparents back together to help us all get through.... well my grandma spoke of all this and more rough times my family has gone through and the hope we each carried with us. I found some things out friday night that unfortunatly still leaves me sick... it was one of those stories you didn't want to hear... one of those thoughts that no matter what you cannot get out of your head. but i guess i just need to hold my head and hold on to that hope a little more...

my heart is in.... MONTANA!

holy shit. i never thought we would get that phone call. i picked mike up from the airport and we hadn't even reached the free way when mtn states called and said he got the transfer to montana. i cried. like pulled over and cried. it was such a relief. no one can imagine how difficult it is to start a marriage 27 plus hours away. its just dumb. now we've cut the gap but 22 hours and mike is now working in fairfield. its about 40 minutes from great falls and 5 hours from home. thank you Lord! i knew sticking to our guns and waiting it out would be worth it instead of being rediculous and packing up our life here and following him. i didn't give my dreams and goals up so now we're sitting pretty. pretty damn freakin pretty! :) i'm half way done with my intern. ready to job hunt here soon. and with mike being closer that kinda ups our plans to a little sooner. once i get my job i'm going to be crackin down on the house hunt and we should be home owners this spring. and i won't be doing the house hunting alone. mike can come home every single stinkin weekend. i can actually start trying our some of these dinners i've been slaving over. ha... best early christmas present! :-)